Fat Chance

November 8, 2007
Nothing good can happen during a conversation that begins with one of the following statements:
“You’re going to be mad at me.”
“I tried to clean it.”
“It looks like the condom broke.”
“Our young pitcher just left the mound holding his shoulder.”

David Frum, a former speechwriter for President Bush, on yesterday’s Marketplace, complains about the obesity epidemic, and, of course, blames the individual. OBESITY IS NOT A CHOICE. Yes, some people lose weight, just like some people quit smoking, and some people give up drinking. That doesn’t, of course, mean that the solution is everyone else should just buck up and follow their example. If we could, believe me, we would. It sucks being fat.

I’ve been thinking about what an example might be to help explain what it feels like. Jim Gaffigan has a joke about eating something, finishing it, and realizing that you didn’t even enjoy it. It’s kind of like that. Eating, for an overweight person, is much more than just eating. It’s sexual, in a weird way-in the sense that you don’t always do it for the right reason, or indeed for any reason, and that you sometimes regret it when it’s over.

John Dvorak reveals in today’s Tech5 report that the vaunted November 11 tech attack by Al Queda is an old crappy Trojan Horse virus that modern antiviral programs will chew up and spit out. I guess, if you’re reading this November 11, you know that turned out to be the case.

Shooting Star

http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/11/07/a-deadly-school-shooting-this-time-in-finland/?hp


Horrible, horrible news, of course.

It strikes me that one argument we usually hear from US gun control opponents is that these sort of things happen in Europe, too, where gun control is more stringent.

If you read the story, Finland is the third most heavily armed country in the world.

Huh. I thought having lots of guns protected you?

http://www.upi.com/International_Security/Energy/Briefing/2007/10/29/chalabi_back_to_bring_baghdad_power/6146/


Good thinking. Bring back the guy who was wrong about absolutely everything, and who is a crook to boot. Brought to you by the geniuses who brought you more than 3000 American dead for no good reason.

Thinner Shula Still Stupid

Don Shula was apparently quoted as saying the Patriots Spy Affair casts a shadow on their unbeaten record, especially if they run the table and dethrone his 1972 team, which is the only team in league history to go unbeaten.

First of all, the activity, whatever it was, was stopped after game 1, a game in which they hammered a Jets team that has proven to be woeful. It seems easy to argue that they could have beaten them with one hand tied behind their back. Second of all, it's a stupid rule. It doesn't give them an advantage that any other team can't get. Third of all, undefeated is undefeated-the Dolphins, great as they are, didn't play the caliber of competition that there is today-guys the size of Larry Czonka are wide recievers and tight ends, not fullbacks.

Love is a Mix Tape

Just finished a fantastic book, Love is a Mix Tape by Rob Sheffield. It's an autobiography, of sorts, about his late wife Renee and their love of music. It was wonderful, and highly emotional, and beautiful. I loved it.

New England 24, Indianapolis 20

A very tight, exciting game which needed 14 unanswered points from Brady and the Pats to steal away a narrow win.

New England set a team record in penalty yardage, admittedly with a somewhat penalty-hungry gang of zebras, to go along with plenty of season marks-first Colt to gain 100 yards on the ground and in the air(Addai), first time New England trailed in the fourth quarter this year, first fumble Manning has lost at home since 2005, etc., etc.

To sum up, New England trailed 20-10 partway through the fourth quarter, but Brady put together two quick drives cemented by long passes to Randy Moss and (former Eagle) Donte Stallworth to steal away the win.

And giving up 14 unanswered, in the fourth, at home? Choke. No doubt about it.

And can we stop with the cheating business? New England is better than nearly everyone else. Period. And running up the score? Please. Both teams are professional.

The Nuge

http://philnugentexperience.blogspot.com/



Check him out.

I'm not saying, I'm just saying...

Alex Rodriguez is going to win the American League MVP award, but I'm just saying...

(courtesy Lee Sinins' Baseball Encyclopedia)

2007 American League Leaders

OPS
Alex Rodriguez 1.0672
David Ortiz 1.0663
Carlos Pena 1.0374
Magglio Ordonez 1.0295
Jim Thome .9736
Jorge Posada .9707
Vladimir Guerrero .9508
Curtis Granderson .9139
Jack Cust .91210
B.J. Upton .894

Waterboard this!

http://www.reuters.com/article/politicsNews/idUSN0122272320071101


"I believe the questions he's been asked are unfair," Bush said in an Oval Office session with reporters. "He's been asked to give opinions of a program -- or techniques of a program -- on which he has not been briefed."

Jesus H. Christ. He's talking about the question of whether or not waterboarding is torture.

How about we get to a place in this country where everybody knows the answer to a question like that? Goddamn it, torture is torture is torture.

I wish we still lived in America.


Nugget from Lee Sinins' new edition of the Complete Sabermetric Encyclopedia:

CAREER
OBA
1 Ted Williams .482
2 Babe Ruth .474
3 John McGraw .465
4 Billy Hamilton .455
5 Lou Gehrig .447
6 Barry Bonds .444
7 Bill Joyce .435
8 Rogers Hornsby .434
9 Ty Cobb .433
10 Todd Helton .430

Todd Helton has the 10th highest OBP in history. Wow.

I never would have guessed that.


It doesn't take long to find out something cool with Lee's toy.

Old Fool

October 31, 2007
Listening: Black Crowes, “Thorn In My Pride”
One of my alltime favorites. Great, great song. Sure, a Zeppelin rip off, but there was something about the feel of this song, the serpentine pseudo religiousness, that just got to me. Wonderful track.

Andy Rooney is a doddering old coot.

My IPod speakers just shuffled off this mortal coil, so its time to get some new ones. Oh well. I have one working one, so I can listen to podcasts pretty well, but music comes through pretty crappily. Not the end of the world.

The Boston Red Sox, the only baseball team that matters (to me), won the World Series by sweeping an outmanned and outgunned Colorado Rockies team, 4 games to none. Yoo fucking hoo. You would think, given my harping upon the Red Sox here, I would be over the moon with joy. I’m really not, though. No one extra will be fed or clothed with the Red Sox as world champions.

I liked this team, though- Dusty and Ellsbury and the Dice Man. Papelbon and Okajima. The Big Schill. Becks. Papi and the Bad Man. Big Mike Lowell. Youk. Lugo and Coco. Even the Talented Mr. Drew. A fun team to root for. I’m happy, but not over the moon.

I’m back working after two weeks of vacation, in case you couldn’t tell. Is my cynicism showing?
It’s just been work-sleep-work-sleep since Monday, which is why I haven’t been posting. As if anyone on Earth reads this besides me.

Sigh.

Democratic debate last night. I didn’t watch it. Apparently, most everyone went after Clinton, which is the obvious thing to do, since she leads everywhere this side of Mars. I’m still an Edwards supporter, in general. I like Kucinich, too, but he hasn’t a snowball’s chance in a blast furnace. Neither does Edwards, either, really. I will vote for Edwards in the primary, and then Hillary, assuming she wins the nomination. Whatever Hillary’s flaws, she is still yards better than every single Republican candidate. The only one who doesn’t make me throw up in my mouth is Huckabee, who I could live with except for the fact that he actually doesn’t believe in evolution, if you can believe that. That’s kind of like not believing in the sun.

Romney is just too weird and psychotic, Giuliani is just plain psychotic, and John McCain drank the Kool Aid.

I don’t have a problem with Obama, necessarily. I just think there are a large number of Americans who will never, ever vote for him-too many for him to win. But if he’s the nominee, I’ll certainly vote for him. He’s way, way better than every single Republican, bar none.

Happy Halloween. Feh.

What a stupid holiday. I don’t have any holiday spirit, or warm, good feelings, or anything, for
this holiday at all. Or any holiday, really.

Just another sociopath, blogging for no one to hear.

“Banana Phone” rules, though. What a great song. I love “Banana Phone”.

Story on Marketplace about a wannabe singer named “DaVito” who wants Starbucks to sell his CD reminds me of the Hedberg joke about leaving his CD in stores. “ ‘You left this behind, sir.’ ‘No, I did not. That is for sale. Please alphabetize it.’”

Banana Phone

http://youtube.com/watch?v=JKf7pPj6T7M


This may be the greatest song ever written.

The Ascent of Man

October 28, 2007
Now listening:
Led Zeppelin, “Carouselambra”
Interesting they are pushing a new Zeppelin release on TV, which, according to ITunes and everything I have been able to find out, is just another album of remasters. Which is fine, I just don’t see any need to buy it, though.
I still don’t have the How The West Was Won CDs, though. I will probably buy them on ITunes someday soon.

Someone asked me if I was going to be out of work for “a couple of weeks” following my surgery. I laughed so hard I choked. I’m uncomfortable as hell, but I’m functional, so I’m here.

We won game 3, in fairly convincing fashion. They trimmed it to 6-5, but we pulled away late again. Game four tonight. They may beat Lester, but I don’t think a 2004-esque comeback is in order. They’ll talk tough, but it ain’t gonna happen.

Now listening: Elton John/Leonard Cohen, “Born To Lose”
I wonder why I bother to take vacation. Everything is either not done or done wrong, so I just have to work twice as hard to catch up. I hate morons.

Now listening: Bruce Springsteen, “Reason to Believe”
I saw this great program the other night. It was hosted by George Martin, and he was talking to Lyle Lovett and BILLY FREAKING JOEL and a bunch of other musicians about the nature of melody. I can’t remember what it was called or what channel it was on, though. It will probably never be on again, now, and it will be one of those things I tell people about that they never really understand because they weren’t there and they don’t understand how good it was.

Now listening: Queen Latifah, “When You’re Good to Mama” (from Chicago)
I wonder if I’m going to be able to sell my wife on a trip to Cleveland this summer. That’s where the SABR Convention 2008 will be.
I’m thinking no.
I work all frakking year, and I can’t take a week to go hang out with baseball geeks.
No, you got married, you stupid shit. What the hell are you thinking?

Now listening: Billy Joel, “Highway 61 Revisited”
Great version, BTW.
I didn’t play nearly as much as I wanted during my vacations. I read four books, I guess, all together-The Battle, about Waterloo, Kevin Smith’s new blog postings book, Scott Adams’ blog postings book, and another Dilbert book. The last one doesn’t really count, though.
Now I have to work every day this week.
You can never get a fatal stroke when you really need one.
Sigh.

Now listening: REM, “The Ascent of Man”.
“Oh, I see. It’s my fault that you can’t read. I’m so sorry.”

Now listening: Guns N Roses, “Used to Love Her”
I’m starting to think about people having children the way I think about skydiving. If you’re brave enough, good for you.
A little ironic now that I’m out of that game forever.

Now listening: John Lennon, “Nobody Told Me”
This is a good sign, I think-one full day of work, and I’m already thinking about suicide again. Terrific. That vacation thing sure helps.

Boston Triumphant

And just like that, the Red Sox bat around in the 3rd. 6-0 and counting, including a 2 RBI single from Matsuzaka.

Love that dirty water....


Kaibatsu, motherfuckers!

Tony Blankley is a moron, too

On KCRW's Left, Right, and Center, Tony Blankley complained about Democrats
"politicizing" the SCHIP battle. He said this because they weren't serious about passing the bill-which they would show by passing a bill that Bush "can sign".

First of all, why? Why should they attempt to work with a president and a party who ran roughshod over them? And secondly, as the host said, governing is about choices. Bush and the Republicans have made it clear that the profits of Blackwater, KBR, and Halliburton are more important than sick children. They should have to answer for this choice.

World Series Game Three tonight. Ortiz just doubled in the first run of the game, and Manny is now being walked to load the bases for Lowell.

Kenny Lofton

http://deadspin.com/sports/alcs/kenny-lofton-will-make-certain-you-lose-313549.php

Hilarious piece, with comments, about how Kenny Lofton is sure death for any hope of success in anything.

Mitt Romney is a Scumbag

On the Post Politics Podcast, there was a story about Romney visiting Philips Exeter Academy, and a kid asked him about the discrepancy between his statement, when he ran against Ted Kennedy, that he would be a greater advocate for gay rights than Kennedy, and his statement now that he opposes gay marriage.

Romney responded, "The New York Times said I supported gay marriage?" That's not what the kid said, and that's not what the article said, and that's not what Romney said back then.

So apparently Mitt Romney is opposed to discrimination, except when it comes to marriage.

And it was cruel to browbeat a 16 year old like that.