Wednesday, April 04, 2007

August 13, 2006
Noon
Another day I don’t have to work. I’m listening to “This American Life”, a radio show which tells a series of stories based on a single theme. Today’s theme is Last Words, the last thing that someone says before they die, which is kind of a sad topic. Supposedly, Civil War general Stonewall Jackson’s last words were, “Let us cross the river and rest under the shade of the trees.” That’s one of the most famous ones I know. Another good one they mentioned was Oscar Wilde, who was supposed to say “Either those curtains go, or I do.”
Death is a funny thing to talk about with a baby. Once again, the time travel part of this is affecting us. You’re a baby now, but you won’t be a baby when you read this, if ever.
The book I just read, “Night of Power”, says that you are an adult when you realize you can die. I can’t disagree with that. It’s a horrible thing to realize, but its real. You cant disguise it.
I learned that when I went into 10th grade, when a classmate of ours died unexpectedly. He had a heart problem that no one knew about, and he collapsed while on vacation with his family. I have to say, as dramatic as it sounds, that my life was never the same. The disappearance of someone from my life like that really affected me deeply. I have been somewhat melancholic ever since then, really- knowing that life was fragile really affected me. I mean, it doesn’t take very much thinking to know that people and animals do die-you know that, after a little while. But there is a big difference between knowing it and really knowing it, and feeling the absence and knowing that someone you knew pretty well is never, ever coming back.
Now the Red Sox are playing again on the satellite radio.
Make smart choices. Remember that some choices are not reversible.

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