"It Is What It Is. Until It Isn't." -Spongebob Squarepants
Friday, August 27, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
I May Be Wrong, But At Least I'm Wrong Before You
It's not Friday yet, and I was going to save this for tomorrow, but I love being first, so here's Janera's Rock N Roll Fridays, featuring the King of Rock And Roll, Elvis Aron Presley.
1. A LITTLE LESS CONVERSATION “A little less conversation, a little more action please All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me A little more bite and a little less bark A little less fight and a little more spark Shut your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me (satisfy me) Satisfy me baby”
What is your favorite topic for long conversations?
Pretty much anything. Recently, it seems to be the foibles and peculiarities of our friends.
2. TEDDY BEAR “Baby let me be, your lovin' Teddy Bear Put a chain around my neck, and lead me anywhere Oh let me be Your teddy bear.”
What was your favorite stuffed animal or comfort object as a child?
I had a stuffed dog called Shelby that I remember. I named it after a local TV reporter.
3. SUSPICIOUS MINDS “We can’t go on together With suspicious minds And we can’t build our dreams On suspicious minds…”
What are you suspicious of?
Anything that seems too easy or people who are very certain about something.
4. THE WONDER OF YOU “When no one else can understand me When everything I do is wrong You give me hope and consolation You give me strength to carry on”…
What is the best feature of your present or last S/O?
God, where do I start?
The fact that she puts up with my sorry butt is a good feature.
5. ARE YOU LONESOME TONIGHT “Do the chairs in your parlor Seem empty and bare? Do you gaze at your doorstop and picture me there? Is your heart filled with pain? Shall I come back again? Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?”
What is your favorite feel good movie when you are depressed?
"The Replacements" is pretty good. "A Few Good Men", strangely-not a happy movie, but eminently rewatchable. "Ferris Bueller" isn't bad.
6. JAILHOUSE ROCK “Let’s Rock Everybody let’s rock Everybody in the whole cell block Was dancing to the jailhouse rock”…
What would be the worst part about being in prison?
I'd be able to read, and I'd be able to write. 3 squares a day, punch out a few license plates. Hmmm....still looking for the downside here.......
7. CLAMBAKE “Hey listen world you’ve gotta know I’m cutting loose and letting go Who needs the worry and the strife Life can be a ball now just following my life Clambake…gonna have a clambake”… What is your favorite food cooked out of doors (on a fire/ grill/ pit)?
Burgers or dogs. Either or. Or both. Which explains a lot.
8. IN THE GHETTO "As the snow flies on a cold and gray Chicago morn A poor little baby child is born in the ghetto And his mama cries cause if there’s one thing that she don’t need Is another hungry mouth to feed in the ghetto”…
Where was the worst place you ever lived?
A tie, between every time I've ever gone camping.
9. LOVE ME TENDER
“Love me tender
Love me sweet
Never let me go
You have made my life complete
And I love you so”…
What is your favorite type of filling in a box of mixed chocolates?
Peanut butter, hands down, you can put it on the board, yes.
10. BLUE SUEDE SHOES
“Well it’s one for the money
Two for the show, three to get ready now go cat go,
But don’t you step on my blue suede shoes
Well you can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes”…
Describe your favorite pair of shoes of all time.
I have a pair of Thom McAn shoes I bought at KMart that I have been wearing for at least 5 years that are still pretty comfortable. Yes, I am 900 years old.
11. HOUND DOG
“You ain’t nothion but a hound dog
Cryin all the time
You ain’t nothing but a hound dog
Cryin all the time
You ain’t never caught a rabbit
And you ain’t no friend of mine”…
What is your favorite dog breed, or what kind of dog do you own?
I love Siberian Huskies, but I don't have a dog.
12. ALL SHOOK UP
“A wella bless my soul
What’s wrong with me?
I’m itchin like a cat on a fuzzy tree
My friends say I’m actin wild as a bug
I’m in love I’m all shook up
Oh oh oh…mm, mmm, oh yeah yeah!”
What shook you up recently?
A family member being suddenly hospitalized.
13. HARD HEADED WOMAN
“A-Well a hard headed woman
A soft hearted man
Been the cause of trouble
Ever since the world began oh Yeah!”
What are you most stubborn about?
I insist that my son be respectful. He doesn't have to like it, but he has to recognize the effect his actions have on other people and pay them the deference they are due.
Game 128: The Half A Loaf Edition
Tim Wakefield, jack of all trades, proved to be a master of none, getting knocked around a bit by the Ancient Mariners last night, while King Felix dispensed some royal justice in a 4-2 win for Seattle. The Red Sox are off today, heading to sunny Florida to play the Naughty Fish for three games over the weekend. Being 5 1/2 games back of both Tampa and the Yankees, if t'were be done, t'were best it be done, like, now. I think anything less than 2 of 3 basically dooms the Red Sox 2010 season. (Although we do have 9 games left against the two teams, 3 more against the Rays and 6 against the New Yorks, including 3 to finish out the year, which will likely be anticlimactic.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Harlem Shuffle With The Invisible Kid
My wife, who is both more talented than me and funnier, found this little gem, where you answer questions using songs from your IPod, set on shuffle. I know, we've done this before, and now we're doing this again. So sue me.
"Creeping Death", Metallica
12. What do you think when you see the person you like?
"Fade To Black", Metallica
13. What do your parents think of you?
"Pop Song 89", REM
14. What will you dance to at your wedding?
"Sure Don't Feel Like Love", Paul Simon
15. What will they play at your funeral?
"She's So Fine", Jimi Hendrix
"I Saw Her Standing There", Paul McCartney (Live)
17. What do you think of your friends?
"My Father's Gun", Elton John
18. What is the worst thing that could happen?
"Peaceful Easy Feeling", The Eagles
19. How will you die?
"I Don't Know How To Love Him," Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack
20. What is the one thing you regret?
"Aint It A Shame", Nirvana
21. What makes you laugh?
"Brown Sugar", The Rolling Stones
22. What makes you cry?
"Romance", REM
23. Will you ever get married?
"New Mexico", Billy Joel
24. What scares you the most?
"Bad", U2
25. Does anyone like you?
"Human Touch", Bruce Springsteen
26. If you could go back in time, what would you change?
"O My God", The Police
27. What hurts right now?
"When It's Love", Van Halen
28. What will you post this as?
"Invisible Kid", Metallica
1. If someone says, “Is this okay?”, you say…
"Wish You Were Here", Pink Floyd
2. What would best describe your personality?
"The Emperor's New Clothes", Elton John
3. What do you like in a guy or a girl?
"Scenes From An Italian Restaurant", Billy Joel
4. What is your life’s purpose?
"My Little Town", Paul Simon
5. What is your motto?
"Everybody Hurts", REM
6. What do you think about very often?
"Five To One", The Doors
7. What is two plus two?
"Somebody", The Eagles
8. What do you think of your best friends?
"Lament", Evita soundtrack
9. What do you think of the person you like?
"I've Loved These Days", Billy Joel
10. What is your life story?
"While My Guitar Gently Weeps", The Beatles
11. What do you want to be when you grow up?
"Creeping Death", Metallica
12. What do you think when you see the person you like?
"Fade To Black", Metallica
13. What do your parents think of you?
"Pop Song 89", REM
14. What will you dance to at your wedding?
"Sure Don't Feel Like Love", Paul Simon
15. What will they play at your funeral?
"She's So Fine", Jimi Hendrix
16. What is your hobby or interest?
"I Saw Her Standing There", Paul McCartney (Live)
17. What do you think of your friends?
"My Father's Gun", Elton John
18. What is the worst thing that could happen?
"Peaceful Easy Feeling", The Eagles
19. How will you die?
"I Don't Know How To Love Him," Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack
20. What is the one thing you regret?
"Aint It A Shame", Nirvana
21. What makes you laugh?
"Brown Sugar", The Rolling Stones
22. What makes you cry?
"Romance", REM
23. Will you ever get married?
"New Mexico", Billy Joel
24. What scares you the most?
"Bad", U2
25. Does anyone like you?
"Human Touch", Bruce Springsteen
26. If you could go back in time, what would you change?
"O My God", The Police
27. What hurts right now?
"When It's Love", Van Halen
28. What will you post this as?
"Invisible Kid", Metallica
So what'cha think?
On Thursday, we think. Here's the Thursday Thunks
1. To whom did you last give the finger?
A client. They were annoying me, so I moved out of view and flashed them both the bird vigorously.
2. If you had 1,000 dollars and HAD to spend it, what would you buy?
IPads, probably.
3. What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?
Coke Zero.
4. When was the last photograph you took? What was it of?
Bunnehs.
5. Who was the last person to smoke a cigarette in your presence?
My wife.
6. What animal did you last pet or hold?
I can't remember.
7. What was the last superstitious thing you did?
I can't think of one.
8. What was the last text message you received?
"What is the Boston Massacre?"
9. Berleen has decided to buy twelve goats. If she trades three for some awesome pot, loses one while she was stoned, what do you think she did with the rest?
There are times when I don't understand you people. This is one of those times.
10. What was the last musical instrument played in your presence?
My wife's voice.
11. What was the last note that you wrote on your hand?
"Sarah Palin is an undereducated fool."
12. Kimber announced that she was born on another planet. Which one do you think it was and why?
You know #9? This is another one of those times.
13. What are you wearing as you answer these ridiculously stupid TT questions?
A shortsleeved dress shirt and black jeans.
1. To whom did you last give the finger?
A client. They were annoying me, so I moved out of view and flashed them both the bird vigorously.
2. If you had 1,000 dollars and HAD to spend it, what would you buy?
IPads, probably.
3. What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?
Coke Zero.
4. When was the last photograph you took? What was it of?
Bunnehs.
5. Who was the last person to smoke a cigarette in your presence?
My wife.
6. What animal did you last pet or hold?
I can't remember.
7. What was the last superstitious thing you did?
I can't think of one.
8. What was the last text message you received?
"What is the Boston Massacre?"
9. Berleen has decided to buy twelve goats. If she trades three for some awesome pot, loses one while she was stoned, what do you think she did with the rest?
There are times when I don't understand you people. This is one of those times.
10. What was the last musical instrument played in your presence?
My wife's voice.
11. What was the last note that you wrote on your hand?
"Sarah Palin is an undereducated fool."
12. Kimber announced that she was born on another planet. Which one do you think it was and why?
You know #9? This is another one of those times.
13. What are you wearing as you answer these ridiculously stupid TT questions?
A shortsleeved dress shirt and black jeans.
Game 127: In Search Of Lost Wins
In a make up game from last evening, the Red Sox, actually wearing very little makeup, beat Seattle this afternoon, 5-3, with Josh Beckett actually looking decent against admittedly subpar hitting. A second game is scheduled to be played tonight.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Wednesday? Wicked!
It's Wednesday Wickedness time , this week with international superstar Angelina Jolie.
1. “All women do have a different sense of sexuality, or sense of fun, or sense of like what's sexy or cool or tough.” What do you do to feel sexy?
Harry Potter doesn't have a wand powerful enough.
2. “I don't think the money people in Hollywood have ever thought I was normal, but I am dedicated to my work and that's what counts.” Do you think people think you are normal?
Probably not. I'm not sure. I've always been bad at being able to tell what people think of me.
3. “If you ask people what they've always wanted to do, most people haven't done it. That breaks my heart.” What have you always wanted to do?
Play major league baseball.
4. “There's something about death that is comforting. The thought that you could die tomorrow frees you to appreciate your life now.” What do you appreciate the most about your life at this time?
Appreciate? Hmm. I'm glad my sick family member is back home.
My family is in good health, generally speaking, and I occasionally have 2 nickels to rub together. I'm a lot better off than most humans on planet Earth.
5. “Where ever I am I always find myself looking out the window wishing I was somewhere else.” If you could be somewhere else, where would you be and why?
I would love to live in San Francisco-culturally, and climate wise, I think it's a good fit for me.
6. “I need more sex, OK? Before I die I wanna taste everyone in the world.”Have you ever felt that you need more sex to be happier?
Most young men answer that in the affirmative, and I probably would have, too. Now? No comment.
7. “If I make a fool of myself, who cares? I'm not frightened by anyone's perception of me.” Have you ever made a fool of yourself? If yes, spill.
Only when I'm awake.
8. “I don't believe in guilt, I believe in living on impulse as long as you never intentionally hurt another person, and don't judge people in your life. I think you should live completely free.” How often do you feel guilty?
See number 7.
9. “I never like being touched, ever. People used to say I held my breath when they were hugging me. I still do.” Are you ever uncomfortable being touched?
Not really, no.
10. “Oh, God, I struggle with low self-esteem all the time! I think everyone does. I have so much wrong with me, it's unbelievable!” Give us an example of what you’ve done when feeling low self-esteem.
1. “All women do have a different sense of sexuality, or sense of fun, or sense of like what's sexy or cool or tough.” What do you do to feel sexy?
Harry Potter doesn't have a wand powerful enough.
2. “I don't think the money people in Hollywood have ever thought I was normal, but I am dedicated to my work and that's what counts.” Do you think people think you are normal?
Probably not. I'm not sure. I've always been bad at being able to tell what people think of me.
3. “If you ask people what they've always wanted to do, most people haven't done it. That breaks my heart.” What have you always wanted to do?
Play major league baseball.
4. “There's something about death that is comforting. The thought that you could die tomorrow frees you to appreciate your life now.” What do you appreciate the most about your life at this time?
Appreciate? Hmm. I'm glad my sick family member is back home.
My family is in good health, generally speaking, and I occasionally have 2 nickels to rub together. I'm a lot better off than most humans on planet Earth.
5. “Where ever I am I always find myself looking out the window wishing I was somewhere else.” If you could be somewhere else, where would you be and why?
I would love to live in San Francisco-culturally, and climate wise, I think it's a good fit for me.
6. “I need more sex, OK? Before I die I wanna taste everyone in the world.”Have you ever felt that you need more sex to be happier?
Most young men answer that in the affirmative, and I probably would have, too. Now? No comment.
7. “If I make a fool of myself, who cares? I'm not frightened by anyone's perception of me.” Have you ever made a fool of yourself? If yes, spill.
Only when I'm awake.
8. “I don't believe in guilt, I believe in living on impulse as long as you never intentionally hurt another person, and don't judge people in your life. I think you should live completely free.” How often do you feel guilty?
See number 7.
9. “I never like being touched, ever. People used to say I held my breath when they were hugging me. I still do.” Are you ever uncomfortable being touched?
Not really, no.
10. “Oh, God, I struggle with low self-esteem all the time! I think everyone does. I have so much wrong with me, it's unbelievable!” Give us an example of what you’ve done when feeling low self-esteem.
The fact that ANGELINA JOLIE said that should give us all hope.
What have I done while having low self esteem? Everything I've done in the last, oh, 3 decades.
What have I done ABOUT having low self esteem? Not a blessed thing.
Game 126: John Lackey can get SOME people out, anyway...
Big John Lackey was adequate last evening, while a 3 run seventh inning rally pushed the Red Sox to a 6-3 win over the Ancient Mariners in Boston. With the Yankees losing, Boston is 5 1/2 games behind the tied Rays and Yankees for both the division title and the wild card spot.
In other news, it is rumored that the Red Sox, presumably growing weary of the Daniel Nava/Darnell McDonald festival, are interested in acquiring old friend Johnny Damon from the Tigers.
In other news, it is rumored that the Red Sox, presumably growing weary of the Daniel Nava/Darnell McDonald festival, are interested in acquiring old friend Johnny Damon from the Tigers.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Game 125: The Rain Song
Even with rain interrupting the work to be done, Cowboy Clay rounded himself up a win, going 6 strong and getting a bomb from Bad Bill Hall to pull off the 5-0 win in Boston today.
Microfiction Monday: "Harrison Hits The Books"
It's Microfiction Monday. Yeah, yeah, it's Sunday. But apparently it's Monday in Ireland. Or something. And it's 5 o'clock somewhere. You can find it here if you're into that sort of thing.
Mine is called "Harrison Hits The Books"
Mine is called "Harrison Hits The Books"
Catarrh? Ague?
Cholemia? Pemphigus?
He studied the books, hunting madly for a clue. He knows she is dying, and it is breaking his heart.
Cholemia? Pemphigus?
He studied the books, hunting madly for a clue. He knows she is dying, and it is breaking his heart.
Are You Ready For Some Football?
Charles Pierce, who I like and respect immensely, linked to this piece in the Boston Globe about former New England Patriot Kevin Turner, who now appears to be dying of an ALS like syndrome brought on by repeated blows to the head.
Now, I love football. I don't love it as much as baseball and basketball, but it's close.
It appears to be as true as things get that football, on a college, professional and even high school level, extracts an enormous price from the bodies of the people who play it.
I love football. I don't love people destroying their bodies and brains to play it. I don't know how to resolve this.
Now, I love football. I don't love it as much as baseball and basketball, but it's close.
It appears to be as true as things get that football, on a college, professional and even high school level, extracts an enormous price from the bodies of the people who play it.
I love football. I don't love people destroying their bodies and brains to play it. I don't know how to resolve this.
British Steal
Or, I'm running out of ways to use the word "Steal" in a post title. Sunday Stealing again:
1. Are you happier now than you were five months ago?
No.
2. Have you ever slept in the same bed with anyone that you shouldn't have?
Yes.
3. Can you sleep in total darkness?
Yes. I could sleep in Times Square if I had to.
4. Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for, the one who got away, what do you say?
I wouldn't answer that question for a million dollars.
5. What do you think about the weather this summer?
It's hot. What else do you say?
6. How many people do you trust with everything?
Counting my wife? One.
7. What was the last thing you drank?
Coke Zero.
8. Is there anyone you want to come see you?
Sure
9. Name one thing you love about winter?
Snow. Every time it snows, it's like, no matter how much you have to do, it's a little bit like a holiday.
10. Have you ever dated a Goth?
No. I should have-there was one who liked me, I think, at one point. But I didn't.
11. What are you looking forward to tomorrow?
It being over.
12. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having?
It's going to rain, and people in my family are going to use that as an excuse to not exercise.
13. What's the longest that you have committed to one person and one person only?
Assuming I mind my manners, it will be 16 years in October.
14. What’s the first thing you did when you opened your eyes today?
Turn off my alarm.
15. Has anyone ever told you they never want to ever lose you?
Yes.
16. Is there anybody that you wish you could fix your relationship with?
Yes
17. Could you go out in public, looking like you do now?
Yes. Should I? That's really a question for society.
18. Do you think things will change in the next 3 months? How?
Certainly. Things always change.
19. Do you believe that you never know what you got until you lose it?
Absolutely. Tom Keifer taught us that.
20. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
Other than my wife? No.
1. Are you happier now than you were five months ago?
No.
2. Have you ever slept in the same bed with anyone that you shouldn't have?
Yes.
3. Can you sleep in total darkness?
Yes. I could sleep in Times Square if I had to.
4. Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for, the one who got away, what do you say?
I wouldn't answer that question for a million dollars.
5. What do you think about the weather this summer?
It's hot. What else do you say?
6. How many people do you trust with everything?
Counting my wife? One.
7. What was the last thing you drank?
Coke Zero.
8. Is there anyone you want to come see you?
Sure
9. Name one thing you love about winter?
Snow. Every time it snows, it's like, no matter how much you have to do, it's a little bit like a holiday.
10. Have you ever dated a Goth?
No. I should have-there was one who liked me, I think, at one point. But I didn't.
11. What are you looking forward to tomorrow?
It being over.
12. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having?
It's going to rain, and people in my family are going to use that as an excuse to not exercise.
13. What's the longest that you have committed to one person and one person only?
Assuming I mind my manners, it will be 16 years in October.
14. What’s the first thing you did when you opened your eyes today?
Turn off my alarm.
15. Has anyone ever told you they never want to ever lose you?
Yes.
16. Is there anybody that you wish you could fix your relationship with?
Yes
17. Could you go out in public, looking like you do now?
Yes. Should I? That's really a question for society.
18. Do you think things will change in the next 3 months? How?
Certainly. Things always change.
19. Do you believe that you never know what you got until you lose it?
Absolutely. Tom Keifer taught us that.
20. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
Other than my wife? No.
Game 124: Bring It On Home
Farmer Jed Lowrie cleaned up an 11th inning tie game last night, sinking the Blue Jays with a solo homer to win the game 5-4.
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