Self Aggrandizement: More Than Just A Job, It's An Adventure

Here lies another story by yours truly. Like many things, it is a melange of people and places and situations, some true, some invented.

I'm actually a little proud of it. I think it has a nice solid feel to it. It's not true, but I've been in situations like that.

If you write, the 52/250 Project is open to everybody, and you can find the guidance for how to submit here.

Game 134: Through The Long Night

Last night in Baltimore, the Red Sox got a 5 run second inning, then hung on through the long night, surviving the inevitable Dice K Blow Up Inning (TM) to pull out a 6-4 victory.

Game 133: Another Bulls^&t Night In Charm City

Last night in Charm City, Jon Lester had another tough day at the plant, but 7th inning homers from Scu Scu Scutaro and Yo Adrian helped bail him out of danger in a 9-6 win over the Baltimores.

The 100 Word Challenge: The Ball In The Street

Velvet Verbosity's 100 Word Challenge, back where it once belonged , managed to go on without me for a whole week. So we're going to take care of that right now, with this week's entry, "The Ball In The Street".

“You’re stupid,” he says.

I know he doesn’t mean it. He is still a bundle of self centered need without any concept of other people. He’s playing with words, with people- seeing how far he can push, what the limits are.

“I don’t love you,” he says.

“That’s OK,” I say sweetly. “I love you.”

He doesn’t register my response. My response doesn’t matter, because his tricks aren’t working on me. My love for him is beyond comprehension, beyond reason. All that matters to me is, when the ball rolls into the street, his fingers seek mine.

Goodbye, Norma Jean

Janera's Wickedness this week is from the one and only Marilyn Monroe. 

1. "I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." When are you at your best?

I'm still waiting to be at my best. 
2. "Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring." Do you ever think that you are boring?

Only when I'm awake.
3. "A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left." Did you ever break off a relationship because you wanted to be the one to do it?`

No. I have done so for less than honorable reasons, however. 

4. "It's better to be unhappy alone than unhappy with someone." Do you feel that she is correct?

Positively. There's no need to drag another down with you if you don't have to. 

5. "Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?" What was the last thing that you didn’t plan on doing but then thought, “What the hell!”?

Probably seeing "Toy Story 3" the afternoon of the World Cup Final. 

6. "We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets." Do you have any major regrets?

Regrets. I've had a few. Then again? Too few to mention. 

7. "What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course." What do you wear to bed?

Depends on the season. T shirt with shorts or sweats.

8. "It’s better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what your not." Have you ever pretended to be someone you are not because it was easier?






Not that I can recall. 





9. "I am invariably late for appointments - sometimes as much as two hours. I've tried to change my ways but the things that make me late are too strong, and too pleasing." Are you usually on time for events or appointments?




Oh yes. I hold to Chris Rock's dictum-there's no early. You're on time, or you're late. 



10. "Keep smiling, because life is a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about." What makes you smile?




Two very close, very small relatives of mine. 

Game 132: Insult? I'd like you to meet Injury

In Baltimore tonight, Josh Beckett and the Red Sox were beaten. Not whipped, not scalded, not thrashed. Just beaten. That's all. Straightforward you're-better-than-we-are beating. 5-2, to the bleeding Orioles.

The season, long declared over, is well and truly dead and buried.

Party Over It's Out Of Time

Internet still down at the old homestead. Son starting to go into withdrawal. No Memes for you, party people. Try not to weep.

The Red Sox were off yesterday. I think. Without an Internet, I'm not sure if anything happened.

Phone losing strength. Send help. Better yet, send bits!



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Game 131: Down and Out In Tampa Bay

Last night in Tampa, the Red Sox dropped the series finale, 5-3, with another subpar outing from John Lackey, combined with miserable offense from a sub AAA lineup. Also dropped were postseason hopes and dreams.


In other discouraging news, my Internet at home is out, so posting will be sporadic for a day or so. Try to soldier on without me.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Microfiction Monday: "Lost On The Way To Coolville"

It's Monday somewhere-like, in Europe, or something-so that means it's Microfiction Monday. Today's story is called "Lost On The Way To Coolville".

He doesn’t know where we are, I thought.

Belpre? That’s not near the beach!

He’s not going to ask, is he?

Oh well. At least he’s cute.

Games 128 and 129: One Team's Ceiling Is Another Team's Floor

On Friday night, Jon Lester was back to his old self, combing with the Bard of Avon and the Lord of the Dance for a 3 hitter in a 3-1 win over the Naughty Fish. On Saturday, things turned the other way, Scott Atchison surrendering a game winning homer to Tampa's Dan Johnson for a 3-2 loss. The third game of the series is tonight.

Something What Which I Done....

......Is Available Here.

I May Be Wrong, But At Least I'm Wrong Before You

It's not Friday yet, and I was going to save this for tomorrow, but I love being first, so here's Janera's Rock N Roll Fridays, featuring the King of Rock And Roll, Elvis Aron Presley. 

1. A LITTLE LESS CONVERSATION “A little less conversation, a little more action please All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me A little more bite and a little less bark A little less fight and a little more spark Shut your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me (satisfy me) Satisfy me baby”
What is your favorite topic for long conversations?



Pretty much anything. Recently, it seems to be the foibles and peculiarities of our friends. 






2. TEDDY BEAR “Baby let me be, your lovin' Teddy Bear Put a chain around my neck, and lead me anywhere Oh let me be Your teddy bear.”
What was your favorite stuffed animal or comfort object as a child?



I had a stuffed dog called Shelby that I remember. I named it after a local TV reporter. 






3. SUSPICIOUS MINDS “We can’t go on together With suspicious minds And we can’t build our dreams On suspicious minds…”
What are you suspicious of?



Anything that seems too easy or people who are very certain about something. 





4. THE WONDER OF YOU “When no one else can understand me When everything I do is wrong You give me hope and consolation You give me strength to carry on”…
What is the best feature of your present or last S/O?


God, where do I start? 
The fact that she puts up with my sorry butt is a good feature.









5. ARE YOU LONESOME TONIGHT “Do the chairs in your parlor Seem empty and bare? Do you gaze at your doorstop and picture me there? Is your heart filled with pain? Shall I come back again? Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?”
What is your favorite feel good movie when you are depressed?


"The Replacements" is pretty good. "A Few Good Men", strangely-not a happy movie, but eminently rewatchable. "Ferris Bueller" isn't bad. 




6. JAILHOUSE ROCK “Let’s Rock Everybody let’s rock Everybody in the whole cell block Was dancing to the jailhouse rock”…
What would be the worst part about being in prison?


I'd be able to read, and I'd be able to write. 3 squares a day, punch out a few license plates. Hmmm....still looking for the downside here.......



7. CLAMBAKE “Hey listen world you’ve gotta know I’m cutting loose and letting go Who needs the worry and the strife Life can be a ball now just following my life Clambake…gonna have a clambake”… What is your favorite food cooked out of doors (on a fire/ grill/ pit)?  


Burgers or dogs. Either or. Or both. Which explains a lot. 



8. IN THE GHETTO "As the snow flies on a cold and gray Chicago morn A poor little baby child is born in the ghetto And his mama cries cause if there’s one thing that she don’t need Is another hungry mouth to feed in the ghetto”…
Where was the worst place you ever lived?


A tie, between every time I've ever gone camping.



9. LOVE ME TENDER
“Love me tender
Love me sweet
Never let me go
You have made my life complete
And I love you so”…
What is your favorite type of filling in a box of mixed chocolates?



Peanut butter, hands down, you can put it on the board, yes. 




10. BLUE SUEDE SHOES
“Well it’s one for the money
Two for the show, three to get ready now go cat go,
But don’t you step on my blue suede shoes
Well you can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes”…
Describe your favorite pair of shoes of all time.


I have a pair of Thom McAn shoes I bought at KMart that I have been wearing for at least 5 years that are still pretty comfortable. Yes, I am 900 years old. 


11. HOUND DOG
“You ain’t nothion but a hound dog
Cryin all the time
You ain’t nothing but a hound dog
Cryin all the time
You ain’t never caught a rabbit
And you ain’t no friend of mine”…
What is your favorite dog breed, or what kind of dog do you own?


I love Siberian Huskies, but I don't have a dog. 



12. ALL SHOOK UP
“A wella bless my soul
What’s wrong with me?
I’m itchin like a cat on a fuzzy tree
My friends say I’m actin wild as a bug
I’m in love I’m all shook up
Oh oh oh…mm, mmm, oh yeah yeah!”
What shook you up recently?


A family member being suddenly hospitalized. 







13. HARD HEADED WOMAN
“A-Well a hard headed woman
A soft hearted man
Been the cause of trouble
Ever since the world began oh Yeah!”
What are you most stubborn about?


I insist that my son be respectful. He doesn't have to like it, but he has to recognize the effect his actions have on other people and pay them the deference they are due.

Game 128: The Half A Loaf Edition

Tim Wakefield, jack of all trades, proved to be a master of none, getting knocked around a bit by the Ancient Mariners last night, while King Felix dispensed some royal justice in a 4-2 win for Seattle. The Red Sox are off today, heading to sunny Florida to play the Naughty Fish for three games over the weekend. Being 5 1/2 games back of both Tampa and the Yankees, if t'were be done, t'were best it be done, like, now. I think anything less than 2 of 3 basically dooms the Red Sox 2010 season. (Although we do have 9 games left against the two teams, 3 more against the Rays and 6 against the New Yorks, including 3 to finish out the year, which will likely be anticlimactic.

Harlem Shuffle With The Invisible Kid

My wife, who is both more talented than me and funnier, found this little gem, where you answer questions using songs from your IPod, set on shuffle. I know, we've done this before, and now we're doing this again. So sue me.

1. If someone says, “Is this okay?”, you say…

"Wish You Were Here", Pink Floyd

2. What would best describe your personality?

"The Emperor's New Clothes", Elton John

3. What do you like in a guy or a girl?

"Scenes From An Italian Restaurant", Billy Joel

4. What is your life’s purpose?

"My Little Town", Paul Simon

5. What is your motto?

"Everybody Hurts", REM

6. What do you think about very often?

"Five To One", The Doors

7. What is two plus two?

"Somebody", The Eagles

8. What do you think of your best friends?

"Lament", Evita soundtrack

9. What do you think of the person you like?

"I've Loved These Days", Billy Joel

10. What is your life story?

"While My Guitar Gently Weeps", The Beatles

11. What do you want to be when you grow up?
"Creeping Death", Metallica




12. What do you think when you see the person you like?
"Fade To Black", Metallica




13. What do your parents think of you?
"Pop Song 89", REM




14. What will you dance to at your wedding?
"Sure Don't Feel Like Love", Paul Simon




15. What will they play at your funeral?
"She's So Fine", Jimi Hendrix

16. What is your hobby or interest?

"I Saw Her Standing There", Paul McCartney (Live)




17. What do you think of your friends?
"My Father's Gun", Elton John




18. What is the worst thing that could happen?
"Peaceful Easy Feeling", The Eagles




19.  How will you die?
"I Don't Know How To Love Him," Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack




20. What is the one thing you regret?
"Aint It A Shame", Nirvana





21. What makes you laugh?
"Brown Sugar", The Rolling Stones




22. What makes you cry?
"Romance", REM




23. Will you ever get married?
"New Mexico", Billy Joel




24. What scares you the most?
"Bad", U2




25. Does anyone like you?
"Human Touch", Bruce Springsteen




26. If you could go back in time, what would you change?
"O My God", The Police




27. What hurts right now?
"When It's Love", Van Halen




28. What will you post this as?
"Invisible Kid", Metallica

So what'cha think?

On Thursday, we think. Here's the Thursday Thunks










1. To whom did you last give the finger?


A client. They were annoying me, so I moved out of view and flashed them both the bird vigorously. 




2. If you had 1,000 dollars and HAD to spend it, what would you buy?




IPads, probably. 




3. What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself? 




Coke Zero. 
4. When was the last photograph you took? What was it of?




Bunnehs. 

5. Who was the last person to smoke a cigarette in your presence? 


My wife. 



6. What animal did you last pet or hold? 


I can't remember. 



7. What was the last superstitious thing you did? 


I can't think of one. 


8. What was the last text message you received?


"What is the Boston Massacre?"
9. Berleen has decided to buy twelve goats. If she trades three for some awesome pot, loses one while she was stoned, what do you think she did with the rest?


There are times when I don't understand you people. This is one of those times. 
10. What was the last musical instrument played in your presence?




My wife's voice. 
11. What was the last note that you wrote on your hand?


"Sarah Palin is an undereducated fool."
12. Kimber announced that she was born on another planet. Which one do you think it was  and why?


You know #9? This is another one of those times. 




13. What are you wearing as you answer these ridiculously stupid TT questions?




A shortsleeved dress shirt and black jeans.