Friday, August 07, 2009

Trapped!

A great line from Mike Schmidt (mikeschmidtcomedy.com) on his podcast-given that we had a situation with Asian women trapped behind enemy lines, somehow you knew that Bill Clinton was going to be involved in their rescue.

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Do you know anyone who, when you say, “nobody listens to me”, always says, “what?”

ME: So, never mind….

HER: OK. I will.

ME: (continuing)…forget I said anything….

HER: What?

ME: I said, forget I said anything…….(long pause)……..You got me again! You suck.

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The news programs, which I have been avoiding assiduously as if they were going to tell me my bank balance or something, have been making hay over the Astroturf “town meetings” where Americans, predominantly older ones, are prompted by special interests to wail and bemoan what happened to “their America”, the America that they had before the so called socialist hordes took over.

First of all, it’s my America, too. You don’t own it any more than I do. I don’t like the pace of modern life either, but I don’t bitch about it. It is the way it is.

Second of all, if you don’t like your government, then change it. Vote the bastards out, and if you like your guy, give money to defeat guys (and girls) you don’t like.

Third of all, if you think the current government is socialist, you really have no idea what socialism is. If you don’t like government health care and want to reduce government spending, drop out of Medicare and return your Social Security check. (And no, this isn’t the money you paid in coming back to you. The money you put in was spent to pay your parents and grandparents. The money you’re getting now is MY money. Social Security and Medicare are generational theft, pure and simple.)

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I have been a devoted listener to Jimmy Pardo’s “Never Not Funny” podcast for quite a while now. It is not free, but it is very inexpensive, and gives you 90 minutes of entertainment every single week for a lot less money than I spend on diet soda per day, never mind per week.

This week’s episode was a grave disappointment, the first one, in my opinion, that he has ever produced. I complained about it on Twitter, but I’m now feeling guilty about it. I am paying for it, but I’m wondering if I was just in a lousy mood when I listened to it, and that colored my response. They seem like good guys, and they work pretty hard on it, it seems. Am I just being childish?

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The answer to that question, along with the answer to the question, “Am I in the way?”, in my experience, is always, “Yeah.”

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